My dear friend,
My excitement was bubbling up, as I was about to see you after a few weeks of trying to work with conflicting schedules.
Now I am left with a deep longing and filled with grief and sadness.
Your voice revealed a tiredness that could not easily be slept away. Your eyes expressed a turmoil and even your smile seemed faded.
I am not ever going to fully understand the pain, but I hurt because you are hurting. I have had my own battles and understand overwhelming emotional and spiritual darkness, emptiness, questions, uncertainty.
If only I could sit next to you, and what I would give to place my arms around you.
But instead, I hope my words are enough. I pray. I pray that God will reveal himself to you, in a very real and powerful way. I pray that you find comfort in Him, that you will know the hope He offers.
Disappointment, expectations and mistakes have burdened my life. I want you to know that you don't have to be bound and defined by them.
1 Timothy 1:14-16. Our God is the God who gives life to the dead and calls things that are not as though they are (Romans 4:17). Romans 6:18.
I also want you to know that you are beautiful. We have a Heavenly Father who is precious and beautiful. He loved you so much that he pursues you and wants you; He sent Jesus Christ who gave his life and sacrificed it for YOU! He has made you new! You deserve someone who recognizes your value and beauty, who fears the Lord, and who can love you with a sacrificing and selfless love that come from God.
"All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you" - Song of Songs 4:7.
"How beautiful you are and how pleasing, O love, with your delights!" 7:6
But now, this is what the Lord says—
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
3 For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush[a] and Seba in your stead.
4 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give people in exchange for you,
nations in exchange for your life.